sarah7979's Blog

Things are moving really fast between me and peter 
I told you all that i was leaving the house and i did 
I moved into peters house with the twins and claire
Sophie is amazing 
she loves the kids. 
I met her mother the other day and we got into a bight of a scrap. 
She was upset because peter and her were trying to get pregnant for many years and he left her becuase all she could think about was having another child. 
That was 2 years ago and she has been trying to rekindle their marraige but Peter filed for divorce and she isnt very happy with the thought of him going out with me as i am so much younger then him and he know has 3 more kids (along with the new baby makes 4) 
- I am hoping we can be friends because i will see her all the time when im dropping sophie off 
 ONTO ANOTHER NOTE _
I reached my 16 week mark on tuesday. 
Mark and Peter came with me to my scan.
Mark and I decided to find out the gender (easier while were going through the seperation)
And were having a ............................................................. Girl :) 
We have looked at names and weve decided to call her Jessica may 
- we told our familys 2 weeks ago 
i have to admit they werent happy  
We called everyone and told them we were spliting up in febuary 
we both knew I was pregnant but we wanted to get out of the first trimester 
- my sister has told me she thinks its a bad idea we keep the baby 
but i got pregnant purposly 
i just havnt told anyone that 
- My family dont like me moving in with Peter either 
but honestly i dont care 
its my life i love him so do the kids 
- Mark is seeing someone too 
she has 2 kids - liam and ryan 
- everyone is moving on and this baby is just a happy adittion 
jessica may , charlie , rachel and claire <3 

Mark and i have been togther for 9 years. We have been engaged for 3 years.
We didnt plan on getting pregnant the first time.
i remember telling him. He was so shocked. 
i was so shocked !!! 
We hadnt talked about kids ever. 
I never wanted them 
He wanted to move to austraillia to set up a buisness with his brother and i was on board. 
But as soon as we decided to keep the baby, we knew that was the end of the dream . If the buisness went bust , we wwouldnt have anywhere to go. 
especially with a baby. 
He is very sucsesfull in his job already. We decided to buy a house. 
We bought 3 bedroomed house with a garden. We moved our cat in there first.
I remember the look on his face when i told him we were having twins. 
HORROR!
he was more scared then i was. 
-- But then he held his little girl in his arms
rachel is a real daddies little girl. 
Charlies a real mammys boy 
But him looking at rachel was the moment it all came togther 
--- Claire was diffrent .
He didnt want anymore kids 
but i became upsest 
i pushed him 
so much 
i made him watch his baby in ICU for four months. 
-- Then , i told him i was pregnant again 
He completely flipped .
He told me he could no longer trust me. 
He then left - this was 3 weeks ago 
left his life 
left me 
left his kids
-- Claire came home last week and he was there everyday with her.  but he couldnt even look at me
we were alone in a room and we kissed
but it was empty 
no love
just hatred 
lies 
-- He finally looked at me and we both knew it was over 
i still hold the ring in my hand 
as if im still dress searching -
ready for this amazing wedding i told all my sisters id be having ---
But no 
im alone 
pregnant 
with 3 kids 

My baby - claire is home !!!
completely smiley and happy 
and more importantly shes healthy!!! 
the past few months have been terrible 
infections were the norm and she was on the edge of death many many times 
- rachel and charlie are exstatic ¬!!

you may say - you can never have a baby again ! But yes i am again pregnant !!!! only 3 weeks but yes we will have another child ! This will be our last child -- 
Number 4 ON THE WAY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 
X

claire made it to month 2
still so small - so weak
she got another infection of the lungs
but she made it through that with no harm done

i made it clear to my family that no one will see her until she comes out of hospital
i dont want anyone to touch her to even think about her
because if she dosnt make it i dont know what ill do

claire is 1 month old today
still tiny but growing
and growing fast
by christmas the infection she had was gone
and her lungs are only on lower level protection
Charlie and Rachel love telling everyone about there sister
BABY!!!!!!!!!! charlie keeps screaming everywhere- i go back to work in 2 weeks because i want to take 6 months off when claire comes home - i just keep thinking 4 more months ............

On Sunday last week I started having contractions - we rushed to the hospital and they straight away put my on medication to put off a premature birth . My cOntractions stopped and I was aloud home on Wednesday. I was put on bedrest .
On Friday morning my contractions started again and this time the doctors put me on steroids to help my babies lungs to develop enough .
They also put me on a monitor to keep an eye on the babies heart rate.
On Friday night my mum came in to see me and the doctors told my husband Mark to warn the rest of my family not to come in as I could be pushed into labour soon.
The medicines went working and my contractions were getting heavier.
The babies heart rate also dropped dramatically so they made the rough decision to have a C-section .
At 3:17 on satuday morning - my premature baby was born .
I didn't get to see her I only got to see a picture of her.
She was so tiny.
Her lungs were not developed at all.
She was brought straight to neonatal care.
Even though we are suppose to be happy I can't stop crying. She has a very slim chance of survival.
My twins came In today. They wanted to see her . But I had to explain that she was sick and needed help.
Then the nurse asked if we wanted to go see her.
Every wire you can imagine was in her mouth. One for oxygen one for food one for excretion one to help her heart beat. One to try and develop her vital organs.
We havnt even kind of thought of names yet.
She won't be here for Christmas
We won't have her
Shell be ether passed away or still in the hospital. She won't be able to leave for at least 5 months .
But we (her family) filling out her birth certificate as if everything is great because she deserves everything as her brother and sister had.
Little - Claire Maria Isabel
Our bundal of joy

When I was 9 my sister Laura died following a long battle with cancer.
My mam took off with my twin sisters Sophie and Christine . She left me with my dad
My dad fought to get my twin sisters back and I often saw them with all there stuff at my house but they would never be there longer then three weeks before my mother would come and take them away again . Evantually dad agreed with shared custody but full custody of me
I didn't see my mam from 12 years old.
She didnt want me
And I didn't want her
But when I got pregnant I realised I wanted my mother there .
But she didn't want to know
She didn't care
Whe admitted to me she didn't love me
Now I don't even know where she is
She moved to Madrid last I heard .
But I don't really know
That sad
And when I think about it I get upset

But I know I'm better off with my dad

Rachel and Charlie are 1 today !
My little babies are growing up :)
Charlie said his first word two days qgo
And yes the jealousy kicked in when he said "dadda "
So ever since then iv been drilling "mamma " into Rachel . .
We had a party today with there cousins . Had a cake and balloons .
We made them a book of memories with pictures and words from family
Mark and I were just thinking about have next year will be so different .
They will be walking talking have more hair be more fun !
They'll also be playing with there little brother or sister !
Yep ! I'm pregnant again ! 4 weeks .
8 months left ! We are about to do this all again !
And we can't wait!

Yep xx
I finally after 6 months of begging
Mark has agreed to try for another baby .
I am so excited
I can't wait to have my next baby
I know its a long time away and I'm not even pregnant yet but I'm throwing my pills down the drain !

Hi everyone !
I'm sorry I havnt been on but iv been so busy with the twins
They are doing very well know
Almost 2 months old !
Charlie is the cryer and Rachel is the shy one.
Twins really isn't that bad
But I can imagine it will get worse
The next part may shock you
It has shocked everyone else iv told
Many people have tried to talk me out of it but it's too late
Me and Mark are trying for another baby
I know it's soon but I was born 1 year and 6 days after my sister and i turned out fine
In fact i loved it !
I really want another baby
The twins are really good and another addition would make it perfect
Xxxx
Bye
Sarah

Hi everyone!!
Well last time we talked I was on bedrest on Monday !

Well on Friday i had terrible heartburn and
small contractions but
Mark brang me into
hospital anyway.

2 hours later they got terribly worse but my water broke soon later

I had a 6 hour birth
And at 11.21 Baby A or
as we call her now Rachel
was born 5bl 2oz great
weight

Then at 11.42 Baby B or Charlie ( boy not charlotte) was born at a little lighter 5lbs 1oz

I'm so happy!
On saturday Mark went home to get everything ready
The doctors said we could take them home and at about 1 today we did

I'm just about to start my first night !
Wish me luck !

OMG !!!
Help me !!
Iv never felt so uncofterbale in my life

My fiancé says it'll all be over soon

To be honest when he says that I feel like boxing him

He will never know what it feels like !!!